The malicious computer virus "DEAT.exe" is infecting nearly all the computers in Darvincia and the people are crying out for the government to do something about it.
"It's those horrible kids. Hacking in where they don't belong. You've got to give us more funding to put a stop to it," says Darvincia Federal Police Chief Faith Nagasawa. "Like with cars- ban kids from using computers until they pass a test and get a license!"
CEO Roxanne Jefferson of CyberMirage Labs has a different idea. "Let us release SAL9000, our new AI, into the Darvincia Network. It'll put a stop to this virus. Nevermind that it's still only an untested beta!"
"Yeah, wonderful! Fix a virus by releasing an AI that will likely turn on its creators? Are you people trying to get us all killed?!" Decries infamous technophobe Cooper de Jong, "What do we need computers for anyway? They will only bring us trouble and disaster! Personal computers ought to be banned!"
...What is this I don't even.