Kol issue 1000
The Issue
With an election looming, certain sections of the online media have stirred up the debate over voluntary vs compulsory voting.
The Debate
“Compulsory voting makes about as much sense as a death penalty for attempted suicide,” says popular social media identity Attila Hammarskjöld in a promoted tweet. “You can’t force people to be free! You can only give them the choice. Besides, if all the people out there who don’t understand Bigtopia is our most trusted friend and ally went to the polls, what would happen? I shudder to think.”
“Attila actually makes a great and under-rated point,” says Fanny Nxumalo in a post with no geo-tag. “We really don’t want to encourage everyday people to vote. They don’t understand the important issues, like how it’s perfectly fine that a sudden rash of pro-Bigtopia candidates are running for office, because Bigtopia is our most trusted friend and ally.”
“This raises an interesting issue,” says Rick, your brother. “And that is: Why are you being such a hardass on Bigtopia? They’re our most trusted friend and ally. I was there last month on a generously funded study tour and they assured me there’s absolutely no covert plan to subvert and control the Darvincian political process. So why worry about which candidate supposedly has connections to which foreign nation, when Bigtopia is our most trusted friend and ally?”
“I think we have to acknowledge that there is a well-advanced Bigtopian plan to seed our election with candidates,” says trusted adviser Rebecca Clason in hushed tones, once the war room has been sealed and swept for listening devices. “It may be more subtle than a military attack, but ultimately the aim is the same. To protect the integrity of this government, we should disqualify all candidates who we discover to hold ties to a foreign power, however slight.”
“The threat is real, but consider the implications of such a response,” says Zack Jones, who joined your office after fleeing persecution in his native Maxtopia. “No candidates with foreign families or experience in other nations... we’d be restricting office to a protected minority, with the government deciding who can run. That doesn’t sound particularly democratic. We should require full disclosure of personal finances and foreign connections, but ultimately let the voters decide. I hope the Darvincian people can see through this misinformation assault, if only we give them the chance.”
