2017 needs new shitposters and we're a rapidly ageing demographic without young people to shitpost for us
This is Dan's long con. First, he will put up with it for a
couple years half decade (you guys matured at an unexpectedly slow rate). Then, he will wait for everyone to get old and boring. At this point, the community will be too old and unrelatable to attract a new generation of shitposters. The forum will achieve peace at last.