So I checked Darvincia's issues today...
"Thomas Obama, head of Darvincia's chapter of Alcoholics Anonymous, says that drunk drivers need help. "Alcoholism is a nasty thing, a disease. The government has to help these poor souls to avoid the temptations of liquor, and wine, and beer, and hard cider, and brandy, and?" His eyes get a glazed far off look, "Where was I? Oh right, we have to help these people, not imprison them.""
Thomas Obama