The story is that Satan came out of the water on a California beach on a magical chariot made of pressurized lemur farts. He flew all the way to Belarus and shat out tomatoes on a chair. The Quetzlcoatl ate a bit of sand from Hawaii and went to the chair in Belarus. He sat on it, mushing the tomatoes. Then Satan kicked the chair into the sky, where it landed in a bakery in Italy. It flattened a dough blob and sprayed the tomato mush all over it. Then the Upside-down Cow floated in and cheese fell out of her mouth onto the dough and then she kicked it into a fire. Then a random idiot walked into the bakery and ate the result.
Pizza.