LGBT Topic

[Bla]

Ok, this is the topic for continuing the discussions in SuperNova's thread.
The topic is about LGBT-things.

Here I have quoted the messages that started the off-topic talk in SuperNova's thread:

Don't be sad because people could think you are different; just ignore who cannot understand your situation.

If it make you feel better I want to say to you that I'm quite in the same situation: well, I'm gay. I didn't tell this to many people except with some close friends (but I will tell this to everyone soon). There are many many people in the world (and maybe in this same forum) that cannot understand these differences (I want to remember to everyone that they aren't choices!). We are this way since our birth and we cannot make anything to change it.

Try to make these people understand what it means and if they doesn't make it, just ignore them: after all people like this aren't a bad loss.

Bla, I'm so happy to know I'm not alone here

However I live in small city (50000 inhabitants): I don't know where do you live, but I don't know anyone gay here... If the 5% valuation is correct we should be 2500, but nobody says anything. I'm looking forward going to university....

I think it's very hard to determine the amount of people who are, since so many will hide it. Statistics say 2-5% from what I've heard.
I've never known anyone else who is gay. I've kept distance to other people for years and for more than half a year I've forbidden myself to talk with/look at other boys at my age, so obviously I don't know much about them.
But it is very special to meet someone else who is and probably has tried the same situations as me.

SuperNova, sorry for going a little bit off-topic, we can make another topic for this discussion if you want?

I've kept distance to other people for years and for more than half a year I've forbidden myself to talk with/look at other boys at my age, so obviously I don't know much about them.

You shouldn't do it if are still doing it. If you talk to other guys without saying nothing you can make friendships, then, when you understand how they think about certain topics you could speak. Maybe you could be worried about how they could react if they discover you're "on the other side" but if they are real friends they should understand that you're the same as before (as I've already said to SuperNova, if they don't understand you, it's not a bad loss...). Moreover if you tell this to everybody you could push other guys to talk and maybe you could discover that 1 or 2 of your mates are like you... and, even if it didn't happened to me, it's one of the best things for us.

It feels too immoral of me to have any contact with them without they know that I'm gay. I'm not afraid of how they will react to me or how they will treat me, but it's very hard to say (I simply hate using any word related to 'gay'), plus, I've shown my interests, opinions and lack of beliefs earlier. I'm afraid they will hate everything I like, mean or think. Science is so important for us and I don't want anyone to think it's "gay" or something like that...
Also, if I talk with them etc., they would perhaps also hate gays even more afterwards. I want to be 100% certain that I don't do anything that could cause more hate to gays. I wish the best for everyone, and I want to be a good person who will cause other people to think better about us.

It feels too immoral of me to have any contact with them without they know that I'm gay. I'm not afraid of how they will react to me or how they will treat me, but it's very hard to say (I simply hate using any word related to 'gay'), plus, I've shown my interests, opinions and beliefs earlier. I'm afraid they will hate everything I like, mean or think. Science is so important for us and I don't want anyone to think it's "gay" or something like that...
Also, if I talk with them etc., they would perhaps also hate gays even more afterwards. I want to be 100% certain that I don't do anything that could cause more hate to gays. I wish the best for everyone, and I want to be a good person who will cause other people to think better about us.

Well, it's a good pourpose, but you are you, and nobody can change it, neither yourself. What's wrong is not our behaviour, but how they react to us. They have to change, not us. Unless we doesn't hurt anyone, we are free to do whatever we want.

Loving someone of the same sex doesn't hurt anyone.

If you love someone or something why you cannot do it the way you like most?? Just because someone doesn't like it? That's not a sufficient reason.

A good parallel I usually do is racism:
You don't have to paint your skin white, or leave your seat in a bus to a white person to be liked by everybody or to make blacks more loved..

but it's very hard to say

I know it , but for other reasons, 'cos...

(I simply hate using any word related to 'gay')

Trust me, don't. It is just like hating yourself...

That's true, replacing gays with blacks etc. is a good way of detecting what's right/wrong, and for seeing what would be accepted by other people.
But right now the most important thing to me is just to get the homophobia reduced and to make people stop hating us. Perhaps it's also best not to think too much about love, it shouldn't take up too much brain capacity which could be spent on Science.

But right now the most important thing to me is just to get the homophobia reduced and to make people stop hating us.

I know what you mean, but again, you are changing your behaviour to be more accepted by people who doesn't like you.

Is it right trowing out from a disco an etero couple because they kiss? No
Is it tight trowing out from a disco a gay couple because they kiss? According to many people, yes.

The second answer should change. You want the gay couple not doing anything at all, so that nobody could throw them out.

Hmm, I have no problem with other gays doing anything they want (when they don't harm people, ofc). I just want to do something good for the rest of the gays by "tolerating" the homophobia - perhaps they will find out how absurd it is in the end by themselves?
I will come out to my school soon, if I get the chance. My plan was Monday, but my parents have no understanding of how long time I've considered, planned and decided it, and say I should "spend some time considering it". Lately they changed their mind back to "it's completely up to myself", but I'm just afraid that they can't see it's a serious problem if I come out myself.

I just want to do something good for the rest of the gays by "tolerating" the homophobia

I do not agree, but you're free to do what you want

perhaps they will find out how absurd it is in the end by themselves?

I don't think so... Black had to fight for a more obvious reason. Moreover we have Church against us...

I will come out to my school soon, if I get the chance. My plan was Monday, but my parents have no understanding of how long time I've considered, planned and decided it, and say I should "spend some time considering it". Lately they changed their mind back to "it's completely up to myself", but I'm just afraid that they can't see it's a serious problem if I come out myself.

Well I didn't come out with my parents yet. I find it terribly difficult...
So I can't help you here..

it's a serious problem if I come out myself

I didn't get your point...

I call this thread era, Supertalking Era.

xD

And the last message was:

it's a serious problem if I come out myself

I didn't get your point...

but I'm just afraid that they can't see it's a serious problem if I come out myself.

I call this thread era, Supertalking Era.

I thought about the era-stuff earlier and was afraid it would be called the gay era, lol.  
I wonder if it's ok to talk about this on the forum.

Btw, FGFG, is there anything I can help with about coming out to your parents? Anything you want to know?

[FGFG]

No, don't worry.

I cannot understand why coming out by yourself is a problem.

[Bla]

Because if I just say "I'm gay" at school (in a context ofc), I don't think they would take me serious or have any understanding of it.

[FGFG]

example:

you: "I'm gay"
mates: "really?" (laughing as it is a joke)
you: "yeah..." (serious)
mates "Oh"

And then try to ask something like "Did you expect that?" or something similar.. It they are intelligent enough they will understand (already told a lot of times )

P.s. Did you ever told it to a friend, or did you just talked with your parents?

If not, first try to talk to someone you trust, listen to his/her opinion and suggestions..

[Bla]

I just don't want other to spend their time on my problems (sorry if I've done this on the forum).
But thanks for your suggestion. I shalt try one day perhaps.
Perhaps another way to do it could be to interfere if someone is making an evil joke about gays etc. But again, waiting on stuff like that is probably a bad idea, and sometimes you just have to do it yourself.

[FGFG]

If you want other suggestions, send me a PM or write here. If I can I'll help you

[Bla]

Thanks a lot. You're welcome to write any suggestions you have, and you're welcome to ask me for "help" if I can help with anything.

[deoxy99]

Why the name: "Eeeeh... Topic"?

You could have put Autism Talk.

[Bla]

Why the name: "Eeeeh... Topic"?

I really didn't know what to call the topic...

You could have put Autism Talk.

That's true, but the autism topic was about autism, not this.
We were going off-topic, so it was better with a new topic I guess.

[deoxy99]

How about Off Topic Topic?

It's a catchy name.

[Bla]

How about Off Topic Topic?

It's a catchy name.

Considerable. I could also call it the topic number it was created.

[deoxy99]

How about calling it Off Topic Topic 842?

You get the best of both worlds.

 

By the way, how do you change the topic name?

[atomic7732]

Eeeewww! Hannah Montana! lol 

Sorry... 

[Bla]

How about calling it Off Topic Topic 842?

Done.
Even though I only chose the best of one world.
Topic 842.

By the way, how do you change the topic name?

[deoxy99]

Oh, you change the subject of the first message in the topic to get a different title for the thread.

[FGFG]

not too difficult 

[deoxy99]

Ok, this is the topic for continuing the discussions in SuperNova's thread.
In short, it is about:

It is about what? A flag? A rainbow? A rainbow flag?

[Bla]

The topic is about LGBT. I should've written that, sorry. In fact, I think the flag gives a completely wrong image of it all. It gives an image of it being funny and things like that to be a LGBT-person, but it's really not!
But the flag is one of the symbols for it. The pink triangle is another, a symbol from when the Nazis sent some LGBT-people into concentration camps. But I just don't like pink. I think pink gives a wrong image of it too. So it's probably best described without any symbol.

[Bla]

Erm, it's my age on here too. Also where's a good place for a first post so that you aren't called a f*g?

I really hope you placed that asterisk instead of an i, or even more nonsensical as an o. If not, please realize that gays are as different as everyone else immediately, and that stereotyping and/or hating people for how they're born is insane.

No, we go off universal time. It's 87.7 until 4 PM California, 5 PM arizona. Then it's 87.8. UNIVERSAL TIME google it

Gay

How can a post be gay?

[Naru523]

Excuse for bump?

I really hope you placed that asterisk instead of an i, or even more nonsensical as an o. If not, please realize that gays are as different as everyone else immediately, and that stereotyping and/or hating people for how they're born is insane.

In the USA, it's almost a free country. So they usually do what they want to do.  

How can a post be gay?

Gay can mean stupid, or good in other terms. Or something like that, someone told me about it.

[atomic7732]

Good? It usually means "That's stupid!", in the way Darvince used it.

Isn't f*g a cigarrette in England?  

[Bla]

Originally gay meant something like a happy person. Then people thought all gays were happy (I can only wonder how they got that impression in societies where it was outlawed), so they were called gays. But people hate gays, so they turning it into a hateful word of course...

So yes, to bigots, gay can mean everything which they don't like. People also call things and people they don't like other words for gay people.

I think hiding the word "gay" under it being "just a new word for stupid, having absolutely nothing to do with gay people" a lie in it's most obvious form. The word is used in a negative way only because bigoted people hate gays, otherwise it would or had never turn into that. And rather than giving up to those bigots, which would also give them the other words for gay people which they use so often about things or people they don't like, I think people should use other words. At least, you cannot deny that when you apply the name of a group of people and use that word to mean something negative, that group of people will see it as an attack or insult of them. Consider if you called something you hated Jewish.

And yes, the word can be used for cigarette in England... But it's also used in other ways which aren't nice.

[Darvince]

WHat did I just do?

[Bla]

WHat did I just do?

You called a post gay. This could mean:
1: You used it to show that you didn't like the post by associating it with the negative, stereotypical supposed characteristics of gays.
2: You used it to call the post something similar to "stupid", while not meaning anything related to gay people. But... I wrote about that in my last post.
3: You used it to state that the post was gay, which makes no sense.

And then you wrote:

Erm, it's my age on here too. Also where's a good place for a first post so that you aren't called a f*g?

Looking at this again, there's nothing wrong with it. I don't know why my brain ticked off when I read "f*g", but... It all depends on what you mean by it. Do you hate gays? Do you have the slightest tiny problem with them? If so, why?

[Naru523]

I know this isn't posted on me, but I'm pretty okay with gays. Pretty much in California, there is a lot of gays here and tried to do gay marriages. I think our government rejected it (Arnold, don't know about Jerry, the new governor, probably still thinking) so yeah. Then I again, this map
says that in California its pretty much legal.

Ah yes, the government passed a law, so gay marriages should be legal.

[Bla]

Good, I'm glad to hear read that.

In fact, I think it's a little bit funny that marriage is debated so often, also in my country, where you can enter "civil unions", but can't be married in a church (I wouldn't either if I should, but it's just a tradition), and can't call it "marriage". I think the homophobia at school, high school (and probably also work, I could imagine) is far worse, but it's never discussed. A few homophobic messages, e-mail etc. have been leaked from the far right party in our country, which has more than 10% of the votes, one of them in which someone in their party said "gays should get a beating". Leaked is probably not a good word here, as the bigot was so clever to send it to a wrong person outside the party. But nobody ever mentions that when the party is mentioned, only it's opposition to immigration (which should definitely also be mentioned)... It's just annoying.

[atomic7732]

Good, I'm glad to hear read that.

stuffstuffstuff

immigration

lol for politically correctness.

Immigration is a big problem here... jdkjsafakfjijfaw SB 1070 just fuels racism and stuff. Arizona is in a bad light from other states right now... 

[Bla]

Hm? Arizona was put in a bad light, at least to me, when both it's government-something voted against something related to LGBT rights. But it doesn't mean that all Arizonians/Arizonarians/Arizonans () are bigots. It just means that their two government-people are bigots... And, of course, if it's democratic, that at least 50% of their population are bigots.
But I assume you're not one of them.

I don't think changing the immigration rules is the right way to counter the racism and stuff, as that's simply letting the racists rule so that they don't complain. Instead, something should be done about the other things which cause racism and stuff.

[Darvince]

Hm? Arizona was put in a bad light, at least to me, when both it's government-something voted against something related to LGBT rights.

What is LGBT? The only thing I can think of is trains, but that is LGB.

lol for politically correctness.

Immigration is a big problem here... jdkjsafakfjijfaw SB 1070 just fuels racism and stuff.

Erm, what is jdkjsafakjijfaw?

I suck.

[Bla]

Lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender. I never know what to write, but I prefer something which isn't a word if I have to.